May 7, 2013
I am new at this so don't expect much... It is a warm, humid, but sunny day. Planted some dill seed and tried to put up a new clothes line but bought the cheap stuff so have to get more. Can't have my clean clothes on the ground.... I am starting this to put my thoughts down, hoping it will help me make some sense of my feelings. I go to the doctor tomorrow afternoon to get my belly checked out. I am afraid because Mom went and 3 months later she died, and I have no insurance to help pay for anything. I have this bulge in my tummy that has been there for over a year but just started giving me problems a couple of months ago. Now I am worried. It seems to be a mass that just sits there. I can feel it... Maybe just a hernia??? Anyway, we will see tomorrow. I worry about so much. I know I am not supposed to and let God handle it all, but I just can't let it go. Lacey is a doll but won't help do anything at home and used to buy us groceries every once in a while and she doesn't do that anymore, or pay for one dogs grooming cost, like she said she would if we would bring them back to the expensive groomer... She is always grouchy too and snapping at both of us. She has a good job but thinks we should just wait on her and she likes her supper ready when she gets home. Tyler, well that is just another story altogether. Such a disappointment.... I will get into that on another day. Stressers? Lack of enough money to live on and my husbands desire to spend what we have. Now I will have medical bills on top of all we have. We have no car payment, no credit cards, or any bills other than utilities and Lacey pays the cell bill. Well, I have boo hoo'd enough for today. Hoping for a great day tomorrow!
